Year A - Easter Vigil or Hopeless Hope Vigil
April 19/20, 2014
We are often gotten by nothing. Our sense of loss turns that into Nothing. We will hang on to bereftness as long as we can. Absent Saturday can continue on for quite some time.
Here in Vigil Time we are to find Nothing melted back into nothing that runs through our fingers like time in a sieve. We look back at all the desolations that have occured to find that there are gaps in our story. Desolation...desolation...desolation....
Litle by little we are drawn through our sense of nothing-left-to-lose to those nothing places. The closer we look, the more we see they are not empty places but filled with decisions to be made about how to live. Choices have been made, time after time, to fall back into a next desolation, but there were choices to be made.
Be still, know that there is a choice to be made, even here. This choice becomes our refuge.
Whether it takes a short or a long time to come to terms with the choices we have, our sense of nothingness begins to fade and color intensity returns. You may need to vigil through Easter Day and the whole Easter Season for this become visceral for you. Don’t give up on a vigil just because it is announced to be over for someone else or for some other purpose. See it through until you can see through it.
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